This past month has been one of the busiest of my life. At least in my head. For better and for worse and all that crap. No, I did not get married. I’ve stayed single so far with no problems and I like it. The whole being single part, moving into a new place and waiting years for the right guy is not the issue here. I’m quite happy being single! The saddest part is that I lost my cat in this process. My little kitteh, my little baby passed away about two weeks after my relationship ended. She died of acute renal failure, and there was basically nothing to do. We could however prevented this for years if we stopped giving her kibble and started a raw food diet, but now it’s too late. I actually started switching her over just a few days before she passed away and that sucks that I did not do it years ago…
We went to the animal hospital with her on the 22nd of october and we had to let her go on friday the 25th. Ever since we’ve said goodbye to her, the apartment has been an empty shell basically and it fucking sucks to not have a cat! Especially not my baby of 12+ years. I miss her so much and I’m going crazy without her!
The weird part is that I’ve wanted another cat for years, so I’ve been sort of looking on what kind of cat to get. During the end of it all I’ve sort of made up my mind that it would be best for her to have a kitten to take care of since she’s not fond of other cats or animals. A kitten might be easier for her. Still when she went into the hospital I made up my mind that if she’d survive this crap, I’d just keep her and it would be me and her until the rest of her life. Now it didn’t happen that way. We had to let her go, but my quest to get a new cat has not stopped. In fact, after she passed, it ramped up heavily because, like I mentioned – I hate to be without a furry four-legged baby! It would’ve been so much easier if I’d already have a cat, or my Great Dane, but I don’t and that’s taken a huge toll on me. I’ve considered it a miracle that I’m able to dress myself in the morning and leave the apartment, to be honest. Being single again has made me happy, but this? This is making me so, so sad! It’s like I’m super-duper happy and super-duper sad at the same time. Too many emotions to say the least! My mind can’t take it! And I’m pretty used to handling a gazillion things at once, since I never stop thinking about stuff until it’s completely solved.
I still hear her when I’m in the apartment, which I still am, basically constantly since she passed – like I always am. I love being at home, generally. When I sit, glued to the couch, I’m waiting for her to come and sit in my lap, demanding cuddles or I wait for her meows for attention. But there is no cat coming to sit in my lap. Every time I open the drawer in the kitchen to fetch a spoon, I hear her paws against the floor, waiting for her to get a lick of malt paste, which was a daily thing for a while to stop her from having too many fur balls. But there is no cat coming to get her daily malt paste fix. When I’m on the toilet, I’m waiting for her to come and paw at the door to let her in so she can keep me company and get some cuddles or drink some water from the tap. But there is no kitty coming to the door. When I lie in bed I’m feeling with my foot for her fur and I’m longing to pet her, making her feel safe in the night, or I’m waiting for her to want to come and cuddle with me under the covers. But there’s no cat in the bed. When I come home I want to say “hey baby” when I get in, like I’ve done for years. But there is no baby there for me to greet.
And it’s making me so sad…
However, there is a silverlining to this bad shitty stuff. I’m getting a new cat. Yes. I’ve reserved one and I’ll become a cat mom again after new years. Let’s begin at the beginning, shall we?
The last few days before Maja, my baby since 12+ years, passed she started to act a bit different. I was alone in the apartment, since my ex had gone on a business trip. I spent my free time watching cat videos in order to search for the next breed of cats. Maja was an ordinary house cat, or perhaps domestic shorthair is the name? She does not have a pedigree and I basically got her for free when I bought her all those years ago. I don’t even remember if I’ve paid for her to be honest.
I’ve known that the breeds Maine Coone, Norwegian Forest cat or Ragdoll are of the biggest interests to me due to their size and temper. Maja was like a Ragdoll, but with short fur, and she was not very social and a scaredy-cat. Otherwise by description you’d think she was a Ragdoll. She was floppy, agreed to basically everything, very social with me and her daddy (my now current ex), extremely cuddly and she talked constantly. Yeah, Ragdolls might not talk that much, but she did. I got to learn about Ragdoll cats from an old colleague of mine from my last job at Funkibator, Växjö. He’s got a Ragdoll and we used to talk a lot about cats. Every time he mentioned his cat, I told him – my cat does that too! That’s how I knew that Maja is basically a short-haired unregistered Ragdoll. It has also been confirmed when I’ve looked more into the breed. In the end I really fell for the breed as well, and the little kitten I’ve reserved is of course a Ragdoll.
I wanted a male cat of course, and I’ve spoken to several breeders in the field. Two of them have kittens right now, one more local to me, but that does not raw feed from the start and she only had a female cat available. The other has a bunch of males available, raw feeds, and is a little bit more expensive, but I thought it would be worth it anyways. She also lives about 2 hours away from me. I went to see her and her cats the other day and the funny thing is – none of the boys wanted me! They slept for an hour at least until they noticed I was there. When I got into the room where the kittens are, one of the female ones woke up and showed interest in me. She was very calm, curious and cuddly – just what I’d like. Since she was the first one to show interest I knew that she’d probably be the best kitten for me, even if she’s female, but thanks to Maja being female, I’m not hard-boiled set on getting a male. It’s more like a dream to have a male since I love males when it comes to animals (and humans 😉). However, a spayed or neutered cat makes sure that the gender differences are not that great, so that is also good.
Her pedigree name is Cherokee Awinita and she’s the most cutest thing you’ve probably seen. Her color is blue mitted, and I’m glad I’ve started somewhat to learn all the differences between them. The only problem I have is figuring out the right name for her. Names I’ve thought of are Mim (from Madam Mim in Disney), Mims (Mim + S), Muffin (means cupcake in Swedish) and Munchkin (because she’s just so darn cute!). I’ve also hade suggestions for Cookie, Tekla and Madicken (Astrid Lindgren character). It’s pronounced like “Mah-dicken”. When you se photos of her, you’ll die of the cuteness!
Right now it feels like she’s either is gonna be called Mim or Madicken, but if you have a better suggestion, please enter it in the comments below. The theme seems to be names starting with the letter M, due to Maja, my old cat, but there is no real theme here. I like her pedigree name as well, Awinita, and the breeder told me that her nickname in the house since I left is “Awww…” Just because she’s so darn cute! I can see why, though 😍. Baby Awinita is the official name until I’ve made up my mind. No matter what name I’ll give her, she’ll get like a hundred different nicknames either way…
A few days later…
I do however have started to get a picture in my mind of her future name. I keep imagining myself sitting in my new apartment in front of the TV either in bed or in one of the armchairs I’ll get and Baby Awinita is nowhere to be seen. Then I yell “Aweeeee!!!” (just like the hakuna matata song from the lion king) and she comes running. This for now might mean I’ll settle for some kind of version of her pedigree name. Like Awinita, but Awi for short. It’s starting to stuck with me somehow.
The image above explains my train of thought. At least when it comes to blue ragdoll kittens. I just imagine a bunch of cupcakes with whipped cream on top that go meow! They’re so darn cute. Balls of fluff!
I have to write about another thing that also happened while I was there. The breeder currently has two litters of kittens, so both kitty moms help each other out with the babies. It’s a really good solution! The mom of the other litter, aka not the mom to my little fur-baby clicked with me so much as well. The reason is probably because she behaves just like Maja did! It was so amazing to see! I started to cry the second time she came and demanded cuddles with me. Gloria is her name and she’s a real talker too, moves like Maja did and just absolutely loves to cuddle! I was so amazed. Then the breeder said something even more amazing. When Gloria is done having litters and is ready to be re-homed and spayed, she might become mine just because we liked each other so much. I mean, isn’t that great? It’s just so lovely! I do hope that my little baby will turn to be a cuddler and a talker as well.
Baby Awinita did not like to be lifted up off the ground and held, but when she was in my lap and I was sitting down, everything was fine. After some googling about this it might have to do with me having cold hands, or her being not accustomed to being off the floor.
When I had my third cuddle session of the day with Gloria, I believe something else was happening in the background. Due to everything that’s happened lately, I was so into the cuddle session I did not think about it until the day after. We’d started to get ready to go out and eat, but I couldn’t leave the kittens and the moms of the litters. Baby Awinita had fallen asleep with the rest of her littermates, but we had to take some more photos of me and her together, since I’ve reserved her so we had to wake her up again. After that was done I started cuddling with Gloria with my third session and I filmed that too. In the background you can hear a kitten screaming, but I did not think about it when I cuddled with Gloria. When I was done, I saw that one of the kittens were awake, the rest asleep and I started filming again immediately and realized pretty quickly that the kitten was probably Awinita. I double checked her gender and it was a female, so it must’ve been her. We had a little cuddle session too that was so adorable and then we left for the restaurant.
The day after, when I started looking through the footage and I’ve uploaded my results to YouTube, I realized that the screaming kitten in the background, that most likely was baby Awinita must have been crying out to me? I mean it’s certainly a possibility since her mom did not react from all the screaming. That was so cute either way! I mean, when I found her it looked like she was sitting there waiting for more cuddles or something…
I have to wait about another 7 weeks probably until I can bring her home, but then she’ll be spayed and had all her shots. I move into my new apartment almost a month before it’s time for her to come to me. At least so are the current plans. Hopefully she’ll be mine a few days earlier than that. The good thing is that I’m more then welcome to come and visit as often as I’d like and that I’d have to do! I’ll go nuts otherwise most likely.
Isn’t she just the most adorable thing ever? Please, leave a comment below and mention how cute she is! Also if you have a ragdoll, please give me advice, and tell me how your Ragdoll behaves!